DYING TO LIVE! (Let's end bullying.)

October is Stop Bullying Month and I am reposting this blog to remind us how deep the wounds can go. Let us all make a commitment to make this world a better place in which to live, by being kind!

Dear Diary, today is Thursday. It was not a good day!  I got on the bus again, but no one would let me sit down and as I walked through the isles, I became the human punching bag.  It’s awful how one kid starts something and the others follow behind, like they have no conscience of their own. They are mean to me and I wish they knew, just for one day, how bad it hurts!  Sometimes I wonder if it’s worth it. 

Mom asked me how school was going, but I didn’t have the heart to tell her the truth!  I don’t want her to know; She’s too sensitive right now with Dad gone and everything! It would crush her if she found out what they were doing to me and Mom has too many things to worry about right now!  Nine month have passed since Dad left for Afghanistan and it's hard not having him here.  I’ll never forget the fear that I saw in Mom’s eyes when he boarded the airplane, for a split second she hesitated and let down her guard.  She pretended to be brave, but I could see that she was really frightened!   

Sometimes, I am afraid - so afraid that I can't sleep at night.  I feel like the world is closing in on me.  I want to be brave and strong like my parents, but at times it’s just too hard! Tomorrow is school and I’m trying to focus on my grades.  If there’s anyway the kids at school wouldn’t happen to notice me...that would be really great!  Goodnight diary,  Janni 

Journal Entry, Friday

It’s been months since I boarded the plane to Afghanistan.  This is a different world over here and believe me Dorothy was right, "there's no place like home!"  The people of this country are striving to make ends meet, much like the folks back in the states, but there’s a hidden darkness of oppression and despair that surrounds us.  There’s nothing more priceless than freedom, but freedom didn’t come without a price and the debt has been paid by many! 

This morning a bomb exploded not far from where we are stationed, it killed several civilians and three American soldiers.  War is not a friendly place and there are nights when I fear that I will not see the break of dawn - or my family again.  This is hell being in a strange world and millions of miles away from home.  I miss my wife and daughter Janni!  To me, they are the light reflecting off the sun and I know that everyday I’m here, I’m one day closer to going home! 

Dear Diary, today is Friday.

Someone stole my purse and dumped my things all over in the hallway.  I guess they wanted to feel really important!!!  All the pictures in my wallet were torn up and scattered on the floor, including the picture of my dad! It made me so mad and it was hard to fight back the tears.  How do people grow up to become so cruel? 

Mr. Tanner, my History teacher, helped me pick up all my things.  He was so kind and I was glad that he was there.  He apologized to me, even though it wasn’t his fault and I got the feeling that if he could have made it all go away, he would have done that for me.  

He told me not to let the bad things that other people do determine who I am and that I’m a person of great worth!  It made me feel better to know that he cared about my feelings.  Today, it was my favorite day of all and I was glad to be alive.  I hope tomorrow will be just as great. Goodnight diary,  Janni

Journal Entry, Sunday

It was a long night without any sleep.  My division was in charge of a reconnaissance mission and we were up for 36 hour straight, but one good thing, the mail sack was distributed this morning and I had three letters from home.  Maryanne and Janni, if you ever get a chance to read this journal, I love you both and it's hard to live each day without you!  Janni, I read your letters today and you have a marvelous way of making life seem so much better.  I'm grateful for your support!  I know you’re taking good care of your mother and I'm glad you have each other. If anything happens to me, I want both of you to know that my world was a better place when it was surround by the two of you!

Everyday, there are many children that leave the safety of their homes and enter into a hostile environment where they are abused by bullies.   They walk through the war zones of  our schools, but they are not alone.  Their teachers are forced to walk among the land mines that are set by those who terrorize the innocent with their ignorance.   

What will it take for our society to shed the evilness of bigotry, prejudice and hatred?  There are many children just like Janni, who dodge the bullets daily and who are fighting to survive in a place that should be a safe zone for our children. 

Janni’s dilemma is not much different from the world where her father is serving in Afghanistan, only she comes face to face with bullies every day!   Children's fears are real and it's expressed through the passion and intensity of their tears.  They get extremely depressed, frightened, and lonely.   When their world is threatened, they carry that weight upon their shoulders and in many cases never share the burdens with anyone!

I wrote this story for my granddaughter, who had an experience similar to this in school. Fortunately, it was brought to the attention of her teacher, but only because another student had the integrity to tell his parents.  The teacher questioned each students, made those involved write a letter to their parents admitting their actions and then she called their parents individually.   The teacher also reassured my daughter that she would monitor this situation throughout the year and with a sincere desire to prevent this from ever happening again.  

We commend the dignity of those noble teachers who walk upon the unsteady and shifting ground in our schools, and we honor those children who have the courage and integrity to stand up for what is right - "for this is the wisdom and courage of  greatness!"

Dear Diary, today is Monday.

Some of the bullies were picking on the new girl during lunch hour.  At first I was relieved because it took some of the pressure off me. Then I remembered how I felt when my teacher, Mr. Tanner, showed up in my life!  I moved my tray over to her table and introduced myself.  She’s so cool, I think we're going to be best friends!  It felt good to do the right thing and there’s power in numbers!  

Maybe one fine day there will be no wars, everyone will be accepted for their individual beauty and people won't have to die in fear, so that others can live in peace!
by, Linda Sumner Urza, One fine day


"We have the ability to change the world through our actions. The light from one small candle can illuminate the entire world when it's shared with others!"